Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Culinary adventures one teaspoon at the time

Today I feel rather good. Lecture went smoothly, went home, had a little nap, and overall this is a very good day. I am tired of the protein mixes, I decided to experiment. I grilled two small chicken skinless breasts, cut them in little pieces, added little Philadelphia cream cheese and plain yogurt. Run it in the mixer until I had nice smooth paste. I sit down and slowly ate one small spoon of this mixture. Tasted great. I was not sure about the reaction as this was the first time I had some meat. After about 5 minutes and two more teaspoons, I was completely FULL. It looks like these two breasts will last few days. No adverse reaction, nothing.
So now I have two winning recipes, #1 - tuna paste, #2 - chicken paste. It reminds me the restaurant scene in the movie 'Brazil'
I do not feel tired anymore. Life is wonderful.


I feel like there is a stigma associated with the bariatric (weight loss) surgeries. There is a stigma associated with being overweight. It is mostly attributed to laziness, lack of self control, being a glutton, and basically all fat folks are guilty of eating as much as alcoholics are guilty of drinking. I will be the first to agree that that stereotype applies to some. I have seen fat folks consuming huge amounts of junk. At the same time some people no matter what – will gravitate towards being fat – like some people no matter how much they eat will stay thin. Since the prevailing attitude is ‘it is your own fault’ the bariatric surgery is looked upon as a drastic, self-mutilating step, to become normal. In critics eyes, same could be accomplished with just a little bit of discipline.
Well, the decision to get such radical surgery is not easy one and not taken in vain. After 20 years of doing ‘other’ things I knew I lost the battle. I could always lose weight, but I could not keep it off. I lost probably 1000 lbs in those 20 years, while getting heavier and heavier. A lot of people I knew were hiding the fact that they had surgery. Just like this would have been something to be ashamed of. And deep down, there is some shame in my consciousness. I feel that what I did was self-mutilation. At the same time I know that this was the ONLY way for me.
Since coming back from the hospital I stopped injecting myself with insulin, Byetta, stopped taking Metformin. My morning blood sugar that used to be all over the scale – from 190 to 350 is now at the steady and narrow range of 150-160. Not perfect, but much, much better. I believe that it will stabilize at below 110 as it should, and without any medications. That is the victory I could not achieve before.
This morning my weight was 270, 15 lbs since the surgery, 33 since I applied for the surgery.
Stigma or not – so far it works and there are no regrets.